That Dry Spell

Sometimes life is dull.

And that is okay.  We just tend to think it isn't.  Our culture encourages us to follow our feelings (despite the horrible liars they are), so when we are just coasting along (you know, like most normal people), we may think something is wrong.

"Wait, I'm not feeling happy or sad or some other extreme emotion.  Help!" 

Now don't get me wrong, I am all for existential angst and enjoy lolling about in it on occasion.  But most of the time, life isn't on the extremes of drama.  We are usually not in the throws of tragedy and sorrow (though there have been years, yes years of it).  We are not often dancing on the top of the roller coaster with glee.  Usually life is very every day.  It is even a bit of a flat line.

And really.  That is fine.  It is okay.  It is life.

Sometimes even our spiritual life dips into the pattern of every-dayness.  We aren't begging for God's comfort in the storm and we aren't weeping tears of joyful thankfulness.  If we're not careful, we may believe that God doesn't care or worse, is not even there.

Currently I find myself in a place where I am not feeling that "dry" spell of God's absence.  I'm not in the valley and I'm not on the mountaintop.  I check in with God during prayer, "We're okay, right?  This is just daily living, right?"  Yes.  It is. 

Where I live has been in dire need of some rain fall.  The last couple of days we've had some showers that have provided relief.  Honestly, when I go out when the rain stops, it's almost like nature is sighing.

That's how it can be with our spiritual connection with God.  When we draw near to Him, He draws near to us.  And it is refreshing.  It is Living Water.  It is Life.

Lifting Our Eyes Unto the Hills

 

Olive's life is winding down after about eighteen years of serious naps.  She's been doing well until this morning.  She wasn't in the basement waiting for her breakfast as usual.  Considering past vet trips, I'm trying very hard to let her go on her own.  It's not easy. 

When people describe why they don't like cats, usually all those attributes apply to Olive.  She's always been unfriendly and skittish.  But Olive is the last of a special connection in my life, and for that she deserves some kind words.  (and I don't mean the words in her "Teach Your Cat To Read" book)

Olive is the last pet in the household that was here when Darren was alive.  All the dogs and cats I currently have (don't ask how many), have no memories connected with my life with Darren.

 

 

Despite all of Olive's crankiness, I still remember Darren helping me get a ladder from the barn and putting against the big maple by the road, where Olive seemingly arrived.  I remember scaling the ladder, plucking her off a high tree limb with some effort and sticking her like Velcro onto Darren's flannel jacket.  I distinctly remember the look of disgust on Darren's face that yet another cat had been dumped at our property.  And the look on my face that said, "But we're keeping her anyway."

 

I remember many friends and family visiting our home and Darren trying to convince them to take  Olive as a door prize (no takers).  Over the last thirteen years without Darren, I look at Olive and I remember that part of my life.  So while it is Olive's life that is ending, a strong reminder of a life I cherished will become more difficult to recall without her rather cantankerous mewing.

 

But I don't believe that's the end of the story.

 

 

"I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from where does my help come?  My help comes from the Lord." Psalm 121

 

I read that when this psalm was written, pagans looked to the hills for their idols to rescue them from their troubles.  God's people knew their rescue didn't come from the hills but from the Lord.

 

Geographically, the landscape where I live is nearly hill-free.  To be fair, my home rests on the cusp of where some hills begin to roll.  If my hope rested in the excitement of the hills, I'd be in trouble.

 

For Olive, for Darren, for me, and maybe even for you, our hope isn't in the hills, the excitement, the bank account, the political power, the talent, the fancy car, or connections to elite clubs or people.

 

Our help is in the Lord.

 

And as I say goodbye to Olive, and remember the too few years I had with my husband, I remember that there's more.  I remember that it's better.  That is faith, and hope, and love.  Love, as elusive and fleeting as it may be, endures forever.

When You Don't Get Your Way

Say hello to Layla (hi Layla!). 

Clearly this is a picture her owner sent in as Layla generally doesn't show up at the kennel ready to entertain at the party.  And somehow I surmise it wasn't her idea to wear this.

We don't always get our way.  I could make a list of Things I Deal With That Were Not My Choice.  And you'd be impressed.  In fact, I could make that list based on today alone.

You probably have one too.  Maybe you have one for today too.  And yesterday.  And tomorrow.

I don't know about you but I pretty much hate it when I don't get my way.  After all, I had a plan.  And it was a good plan. It would have worked brilliantly and now I don't have my plan and probably have something ten times worse instead.

When I don't get my way and I'm mad about it, I don't put on a cute little costume like Layla's and go to the party.  My party is what one may call A Pity Party.  And I go all out.  I pity in style.

Sometimes I have to get all the pity and pouting out of me - like a kegger of misery - before I turn the corner on my attitude.

The whole time I imagine God watching my spiritual temper tantrum with a smile.  He knows what I don't - that His plan is so much better, but I likely will not understand.  Ever.  Not this side of eternity anyway. 

It turns out I have to trust, but I do it begrudgingly.  And I suspect God is okay with that too.  After all, Jesus was God incarnate and knows the misery and trials of being human.  Even though he seems to have successfully avoided pity parties, he had to deal with some real creeps.  He got mad at some, but he did it in a really righteous way.  And then he went and loved the people who are likely not on our party list at all.

Fortunately my existential angst and ensuing pity and pouting doesn't happen as often as it used to.  Maybe I am learning something.  But I take great comfort in knowing that God regards me with the eyes of love and forgiveness.  Like a father watching his pouty child.  Like an owner watching his cute dog in a party costume.

The Roofers are Coming! The Roofers are Coming!

Dooley, seen here in a serene moment under the lilac bush.

Little did he know then that within 24 hours, his life would turn upside down with chaos.

At least fifteen young men descended upon the property, swarming the roof with tools, making noise and making a mess.  To Dooley and the other cats, something unimaginably terrible was happening (to the dogs, it was a party with the best dog tv ever).

If only I could explain to them that the threatening noise and people were doing something good to their home - making it safer and stronger - for their protection.

It struck me that I am often like my cats.  I look around me and see a lot of troubling circumstances.  It seems like the end of the world (or at least MY world).  But God is at work, building and reinforcing my framework in ways I often don't understand.

While it is impossible for me to become a cat or learn a cat language to explain what was happening amidst the whirl of activity, Jesus was God incarnate, and explained a lot to his followers.  While God's word doesn't have a specific explanation for our situations, Jesus tells us what we need to know - He is with us - He will never leave us - His plan is good and His love endures forever.

If you feel like the hammering of your trials is too much, perhaps some greater work is being done, unseen and unknown.  It is a walk of faith.

That Which We Embrace

Matilda got a new toy. 

No matter the stuffed animal, she cuddles next to it.

She also rips out its eyeballs.

Like Matilda and her stuffed toys, we are attracted to that which is cute, fuzzy and makes us feel good.  We may even embrace it. 

But not everything that draws us is good for us.  Don't believe me?  Ask me about that "cake for one" thing Chief's supermarket has now.  Yeah, it's a problem. 

I Corinthians 10:23 (that would be "First Corinthians" not "One Corinthians") says - in a variety of translations:

Phillips:  As I have said before, the Christian position is this: I may do anything, but everything is not useful. Yes, I may do anything but everything is not constructive. Let no man, then, set his own advantage as his objective, but rather the good of his neighbor.

English Standard:  “All things are lawful,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up.

The Message:  Looking at it one way, you could say, “Anything goes. Because of God’s immense generosity and grace, we don’t have to dissect and scrutinize every action to see if it will pass muster.” But the point is not to just get by. We want to live well, but our foremost efforts should be to help others live well.

What the Message says - "the point is NOT TO GET BY" is key.  We are to be deliberate in our choices, thinking them through, how a choice I make effects others, not just how I FEEL about said activity.

Perhaps you, like me, were raised in a culture that gives the impression that what is EVIL is dressed in red and has a pointy tail and ears, like that which is bad for us would be extremely obvious so of course we would avoid it like the black plague.

But oh no, it is not.  It is topped with chocolate icing, a dollop of whipped cream and stuffed provocatively in one of those plastic clam shell containers.  Did I forget to mention the cherry on top?

Yeah, that's certainly legal.  It is within my freedom to consume it.  But it certainly doesn't help me live well IN THE LONG RUN.  And in a consumeristic "please me now" "feed my emotions" culture, we forget all about the long run.

Before you nuzzle up to that which draws you in, be sure to set aside the "feels" and do the hard work of the "thinks".  "Let us reason together" to see if our choices stand for more than "getting by."

Redeeming the Pain

Seeing the best in people isn't always easy.  Since the kennel allows me to see people with their dogs, I often see a side others do not.  It's that soft, squishy side - the one that baby talks to our pets.

This week I learned a former kennel client died.  And though she died months ago, I was still sad because she was quite young and seemed to die alone.

She showed up on a blustery, icy winter day wearing clothes that were certainly not appropriate for the weather.  One might say they wouldn't be appropriate for humans to wear period. It wasn't hard to see why she was the subject of scandal.

At that time, I didn't know the scandal, I just saw a mismatched couple in every sense of the word.  And their dog.  They sure loved that dog.

Over the years, I got to know her better.  And her dogs.  She seemed to have many.  Then her husband got sick.  Then he died.

Her husband plucked her out of a seriously bad situation.  Like the dogs she rescued from the pounds, she was redeemed by love, even if it looked odd and maybe questionable.

After he died, I saw her make some terrible choices.  She just couldn't pull herself together.  We had some interesting conversations.

But sometimes I think I should have done more.

It can be a tricky, trying to decide just how much to get to know a person, and what you may say to them.  If I could have one more conversation with her, I would have reminded her that the love her husband had for her didn't die.  Love never dies.  God is love.  God's Son, Jesus, showed up in the flesh, suffered horribly and loved abundantly.  He redeemed our pain.  His love never dies.  His love redeems.

I hope she knew that somewhere deep in her heart.  Because it's true for her and it's true for me and it's true for you.

In case you didn't know that, or maybe you just forgot, it's true.  He's there, waiting for you to bring that pain, loss, doubt and stumbling blocks.  Just don't wait too long.

Closer

It happened.  Tilly and Emmit actually leaned on each other.  Though they still aren't playing, they do seem to comfort each other by being physically close such as here and on the couch.

We often have to overcome obstacles to get close to someone else.  Perhaps they've hurt you in the past, or it's just hard to get to know them.  Trust can take a longer time for some than others. 

The same is true of our relationship with God.  Even though He is always there, calling us, we often hesitate.  We've been hurt before, often by those claiming to be His People (and, often really are).  We don't trust what we can't see easily, yet we may be compelled. 

"Draw near to God and He will draw near to you."

Comforting words.  The tough part is we take the first step.  However, His presence never fails.

I hope Tilly and Emmit continue to grow closer to each other, just as I hope to deepen my relationship with God.  It's certainly worth it.  And sometimes it's even cute.